So as I've said many times before, I LOVE 90's horror. For the most part, the basis of their appeal to me is that they are so amazingly cheap and cheesy! (Mmmm, cheese.) I like simple, uncomplicated, in your face this is what I am love me or hate me I don't give a fuck! - type of movies. So, I thought I'd make a little post about some of my favs, 'cos they're oh so good and whoever is reading this you should make the good choice and go rent them. Bask in their gloriously cheese-filled goodness! Sharp Cheddar. It's the only way to go. You know you want to.
1. (of course) Scream (1996)- You all already know how much I love this movie, I've gushed about it at least twice already in past blogs and I don't want to be annoyingly repetitive so I'll keep it brief. I love 90's horror and I love teen slashers so a movie that successfully mocks that very genre has GOT to be my #1. There are so many little gems in that movie that keep me hooked, from the actually very creepy/haunting beginning sequence, the annoying Rose McGowan and her slutty one-liners, the horrible neon outfits Courtney Cox wears, to the ridiculous scene where the killer is watching them in the grocery store (how could no one else notice that?!). It's just too good! I could go on and on about how awesome it is but if you don't believe me now you probably never will. And that's totally your loss. If it weren't for this film, how would we know the horror film rules? One, don't have sex! Two, don't drink or do drugs! Three, never say 'I'll be right back'! 'Cos you won't be. Essential life lessons I think, there's something in this movie for everyone. Not to mention, the end song is Moby. Moby! ... Ha, brief my ass. Oh well.
2. House on Haunted Hill (1999)- My little blurb about the 90's 'simple, uncomplicated, in your face this is what I am love me or hate me I don't give a fuck' kind of basically describes this movie to a tee. The way they just kind of throw you into the character's plots w/ no real back story explanation is strangely alluring. Loaded cast, horrible CGI effects, pretty hilarious dialogue, and who ends up surviving at the end of the movie is quite a surprise. I love every minute of this bad movie.
3. Event Horizon (1997) - astronaut scientists, black holes, a ghost ship that's essentially alive?! How could you not love this movie? Aside from the sometimes painfully obvious plot holes and an almost overdose on sci-fi cheesiness... I feel like if you sit back w/ a cold beer and some homies and just enjoy it for what it is, a fucking fantastic horrible movie then you'll love it as much as I do.
4. The Faculty (1998)- This movie has held a special place in my heart since my embarrassingly early teen years. Who here doesn't love that age old question; what would you do if aliens were taking over your high school? In high school I actually sometimes really felt like something fishy was going on, I mean, high school teachers are fucking WEIRD man! It's definitely a tale that reaches out to the high school misfits of the world as we see how all our characters band together to save their high school and the world from an alien invasion... plus Josh Hartnett is just such a bad ass!
5. From Dusk Till Dawn (1996) - OK. Crazy Quentin Tarantino. Young, bad ass George Clooney with a sick tattoo. A game of cowboys and indians (er, criminals and hostages) and a disturbing sequence of events that leads the main characters to a town of VAMPIRES. Good. fucking. times. (I say 'fucking' a lot, I've realized. Damn I have such a potty mouth. Apologies!) That's all that really needs to be said about this movie. Go rent it. Go rent it now.
6. Silence of the Lambs (1991) - He said, "I can smell your cunt." I love Hannibal Lector/Anthony Hopkins. The end.
7. Urban Legend (1998) - Ok, a movie based on someone going around killing people in the style of popular urban legends? How could you NOT love a movie like that?! Again, just as in Scream, the beginning sequence of this movie still to this day kind of scares the shit out of me. "THERE'S SOMEONE IN THE BACK SEAT!" Seriously. Sends chills down my spine just thinking about it. Too good, too good! Plus, Jared Leto anyone? Again.. sigh.
8. Halloween H20 (1998) - I am a huuuuuge fan of the original Halloween. Michael Myers just might be my favorite psychopath. No matter how many times I've seen that movie, the eery theme music always makes me check twice that all the doors and windows are locked and that some sort of weapon to defend myself is close by. And while I did NOT like Halloween's 3-5, Halloween H20 was a welcome change. Takes place 20 years later when Laurie Strode is the mother of Josh Hartnett (siiighh.) and she's still being haunted by her past, paranoid as ever that her brother is going to come back someday to finish what he started. The same awesome theme music, a new and fresher cast (except for Jamie of course), Michael Myers is still just as terrifying as ever and Jamie Lee Curtiss STILL has got it goin' on! Girl, get down with your bad self.
9. Se7en (1995) - Really a movie for the morbidly curious. I myself could never resist a movie based on something as fucked up as a man killing people according to the seven deadly sins. While Brad Pitt himself I find slightly annoying in the movie Morgan Freeman is (as always) a complete bad ass and Kevin Spacey... just wow. The lust scene might haunt you forever though. Just a warning.
10. Dead Alive (1992) - Peter Jackson LOTR fans, eat your heart out! Way before he made that epic trilogy he actually had quite the talent for bringing on the gore. For those of you that are like me and love you some hilarious one-liners and a slew of good, (not) clean zombie fun, this is definitely a movie for you! Warning - definitely not a movie for the weak of stomach. But in my humble opinion? Suck it up and watch it! It's totally worth it.
This is not helping.
1 week ago